The Children's Movie From Your Nightmares

Hey Greg .

I hope you're all having a great day .

Welcome back to my channel .

This of course is another episode of Pumpkin Time .

So it's getting pretty close to Halloween .

I've released my Halloween song for the year .

Spooky Hoe .

I've been watching a lot of fun Halloween movies and I've also been getting a lot of suggestions from people asking if I would review certain Halloween movies , movies like Hocus Pocus Halloween Town , all movies that I've seen before .

But one movie that I've been getting recommended a lot uh is one that I have never heard of before and it's called Spooky the Square .

Pumpkin .

A bunch of people have sent me this movie on Twitter and Instagram and I had never heard of it before .

So I watched the movie and I don't know , I don't know if I'd even say that it's like a bad movie .

It's fine .

It's just really weird .

It's very unnecessarily brutal at times and I also can't really make heads or tails of the moral of this movie .

It has a really weird moral .

The way that the characters treat each other in this movie is very bizarre and then the way it ends , just comes out of left field and really left me wondering what , what the moral of this movie is supposed to be .

So anyway , let's take a look .

Let's sit back , relax and enjoy spookily the square pumpkin .

Our story begins as most stories do with something worth telling with something that's new .

This story takes place on Holiday Hill Farm where every day is a holiday .

Come on along , come on .

Come on a along along along .

Was he trying to rhyme the first two lines rhymed .

And then he said , Farm and I assume he was trying to rhyme something with Farm .

And so instead of saying , come on or come along , he said , come on Alan , which doesn't rhyme or make sense .

So I don't know why he said that there's some shit that happens at the beginning of the movie that's not really important to the movie .

Doesn't really have anything to do with the plot .

Doesn't drive any of the plot at all .

There's these two bats and one of them is trying to eat a lady bug .

He's starving .

He's trying to eat some breakfast .

I hate fast food .

So let's make this as quick and painless as possible for me .

So he's cornered this lady bug .

He's about to eat the ladybug .

The ladybug's like fuck .

But then his friend or I don't know if it's his girlfriend or his wife or maybe it's his sister .

They never establish what relationship these two people have or two bats have .

But she's like , hold on .

Don't eat that lady .

B Mr , you're giving bats a bad name .

Have some granola instead .

How many times do I have to tell you ?

It's this kind of behavior that gives bats a bad name but be I'm hungry .

No low fat , high protein and no squirming .

So she's like trying to get this other bat to be a vegan bat just only eat granola , I guess , instead of eating bugs , which is what bats are supposed to do .

But like I said , this has literally nothing to do with the plot because once the lady bug leaves then like the plot actually starts , they lift up a leaf , they see something crazy and so they fly over to the scarecrow who I think is like in charge of the pumpkin patch forest Bello .

Who , who , who , what is it ?

Well , it's kind of a oh wow .

So he starts walking over and as he's walking , he trips over these two pumpkins who I think are like conjoined twins , but instead of like tripping and falling or like starting to trip and stopping , he just keeps walking .

Where are we going ?

And the two pumpkins are like yelling at him the entire time like , yo , what's , what are we doing ?

What's going on ?

And the scarecrow just doesn't acknowledge them at all .

He just keeps walking like a fucking robot and just stares directly ahead with that 1000 yard stare .

Like his , his mind is totally someplace else .

It's actually kind of creepy how long he's walking for without realizing that he's tripping over two screaming pumpkins .

Like , what could he possibly be thinking about that is distracting him from the fact that he's been tripping for the past five minutes .

But when he finally gets over to where the bats were , he lifts up the leaf and lo and behold , it's a square ass pumpkin .

Hello there , little fella .

And his name is Spooky .

What's your name ?

Spooky ?

So the whole pumpkin patch comes over and looks at the square pumpkin and I thought they were all just gonna be like , oh neat .

That's kind weird .

A square pumpkin .

But this is a children's movie .

They're trying to teach a lesson .

So immediately , you know , they need to start with the conflict .

So this little pumpkin , he's one of the conjoined twins .

Little Tom just immediately starts going in on Spooky just ripping into it .

The cutest thing .

Cute .

You're not gonna let that orange brick grow here with the rest of us , are you ?

He's not like us .

He's a freak of nature .

A mistake .

He calls him a freak of nature and a mistake .

Like holy shit .

I'm pretty sure Spooky is a baby because they just found him , right ?

He must be a brand new pumpkin .

So he's a baby .

He calls him a freak of nature .

A mistake .

A weed .

Hey , we all mean things to say to a baby .

Then to make matters worse .

He starts singing a whole last song about how ugly and weird spooky is and the whole pumpkin patch joins in .

All the pumpkins in this patch are nice and round real mash but not spooky .

Look at him .

Spooky the square pumpkins .

You see what I mean about being unnecessarily brutal .

First , this one dude is roasting this poor baby that looks different .

And then like the whole town joins in in a song about how weird this kid looks , imagine like a baby being born in the hospital and having some unique feature about them that makes them look different than everyone else .

And the doctor's like , what the fuck is up with this baby dude is the , he's a fucking freak of nature .

And then like one of the nurses comes in and starts snapping , the parents start dancing even they're in on it and they start singing what the fuck is up with this kid .

And the whole hospital comes in to look at the ugly little baby and they all have like a dance number that they're doing and the baby's just sitting there like , I don't even know how to talk yet , but I still think I'm getting the sense that everyone doesn't like me .

Big town .

That's true .

It happens every year .

The best will get picked .

I guess you'll rot here .

I guess you'll just rot here .

Holy shit .

Jesus man .

Little square ass bitch .

You think anyone could ever love you ?

You're gonna fucking die before anyone loves you .

No one will ever love you .

Ugly , baby , ugly baby .

Look at him .

I can't believe the whole town joined in to sing this song .

It seemed like it seemed like maybe someone was gonna give poor spooky a chance .

But no , they're all racist against square pumpkins .

It's hard to when you found your a square .

And the rule is Ralph .

Look , you're so rectangular .

Oh God , he's so , he's so triangular .

That's just not true .

They said he was rectangular and then I guess we're looking for a rhyme and the only thing they could think of was triangular , but that's just a lie .

Not only are these pumpkins racist , but they're also done .

So the song ends and I have to say Spook Leb takes all this pretty well for being a literal infant .

He just goes off into the patch and sulks for a little bit .

Staying in the patch is one thing , but there's no way .

No how and not the slightest possibility that pointy over there is going to be allowed in the Jack Olympics .

Oh gosh .

Little Tom goes on this whole rant about how Spooky is not a real pumpkin because he's a square .

So he can't be a part of the patch , but he most definitely can't be part of the Jack Olympics .

I just killed a Fruit Fly .

The Jack Olympics are basically this competition .

They have every year to see who gets to be the pick of the patch on Halloween and the winner of the Jack Olympics is how we the patch for Halloween .

They never really explain what that is , but I assume it's just like the pumpkin that gets put in the front for people who are coming to buy pumpkins on Halloween .

Like this is the pumpkin you want .

So this brings up an interesting point and I don't think that the writers really intended for people to examine the movie in this way .

But do these pumpkins know what happens to Pumpkins when they're bought by humans ?

The whole movie ?

They're like fawning over getting picked by a human .

It seems like sole purpose in life is to get chosen by a human .

I'm just worried about the Jack Olympics is what I'm trying to say because if the human world that we live in is the same as like the human world in this movie , then all of these pumpkins are competing in a tournament of skill uh and where the winner gets to get murdered .

They all want to be like the best pumpkin in the patch .

So a human will come along and cut off their head and scoop up their cut holes in their face for eyes or actually , I guess they already have .

I so I don't know what they'll do for that .

Maybe they just poke them out either way .

It seems like a pretty gruesome fate and not a very good prize for winning a tournament .

Spooky .

I'm not , listen , dog .

I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life .

But if I were you , I would , I'd be pretty happy to be excluded from the Jack Olympics .

The scariest part is , I feel like the Pumpkins have no idea what happens when they get picked by a human .

But I feel like the scarecrow does like he's sort of the ringleader around here .

It seems like he's in charge .

There's no way he does it know what goes down when a human picks a pumpkin .

He's sort of like this goofy kind and caring figure on the outside , but deep inside he knows he's leading these pumpkins to their death and sure , maybe it's a kid's movie and I'm way over analyzing it .

But if you're gonna make a whole movie about personified pumpkins , people are gonna have some question anyway , Spooky is back in the middle of the pumpkin patch and he's all sad .

So he starts singing his own song .

If I was , then you'd see they would .

One and so far the only two songs in this movie have the exact same premise .

The premise being Spooky is not round and that's no good .

I was more like them and less like me and maybe with the right if I was around , if I was born , like them .

He's also singing around all of these faceless pumpkins , which kind of concerns me like , why don't these pumpkins have faces ?

Are these like fetus pumpkins ?

Like they haven't been born yet ?

Like this is where Spook le came from or where are these pumpkins dead ?

Is Spooky .

This song about how daddy is in a field of corpses or do only some pumpkins come to life and the rest are just regular ass pumpkins .

That'd be like if some babies came out when they were born and it like some just don't have faces and you're like , oh it's just , it's just one of the a regular baby .

These ones are just for decoration and you put it like put it on your mantel and then you can just set it down and it just stays like that .

Uh I didn't like , I don't like that .

I had that thought , I don't like that .

I came up with that .

I don't like thinking about that .

I don't like that at all .

So if you win the Jack Olympics , uh on top of being pick of the patch , you also get a candy down .

Did somebody say candy ?

And there's this group of spiders that really want the candy corn crown ?

So they're like , well , if we help Spooky win , then we can get the candy corn crown .

So they offer to help Spooky win the Jack Olympics .

You know , Spooky , I think there's an itsy bitsy spider inside of you .

Gross .

And we're gonna help you win that delicious scrumptious mouthwatering sugar coated Crown , aren't we ?

Boys ?

Well , let's get the Jack Olympics started .

I don't know if I can do this .

Sure you can come on .

Besides , you'll never know if you never try .

Oh , what it , what a sweet moment .

A little bit of motivation for spooky .

I , I think things are finally gonna turn around so you can probably guess what's gonna happen .

Now .

They're gonna do the Jack Olympics .

And even though everyone doubted Spook Lee , he's still gonna do really well at the Jack Olympics , he's gonna win .

Everyone's finally gonna respect him and that'll be the end of the movie , right ?

Nope , dude , he fucking loses .

He sucks so bad at all the events .

It's hilarious .

The first event , it's a race .

He gets trampled , practically drowns in a puddle of mud .

People whiz by him so fast .

He spins around or like a , like a cartoon .

I guess it is a cartoon , but he spins around like a cartoon .

Been around for too long .

If you ask me , I thought this movie was gonna be like just because you're different , doesn't mean you can't be just as good at things as everyone else , you know , just because you're a square .

Pumpkin doesn't mean you can't kick the other pumpkin's ass in the Jack Olympics .

You can do it if you put your mind to it .

But no , the writers were just like nah , dude , basically , if you're not normal , you're gonna fucking suck at everything .

You're not gonna be able to do all the things that the other other people can do .

Basically , what's gonna happen is you're gonna lose at everything all the time .

And we're making this movie for Children to introduce you to that harsh reality right away .

He fails at all the other events to bowling , which obviously you have to be a round pumpkin to do so .

He doesn't even make it to the pins .

This movie is brutal .

Dude .

Spooky can barely even walk between events .

He's like dragging himself along the ground .

Everyone's probably like , you know , at first we didn't want you to compete because you're different and we thought that was weird .

But now we just like now we just don't want you to compete because you're making everyone sad .

Everyone feels really bad for you .

Can you please just , can you please stop because you're making everyone sad .

The majority of this movie is just this poor baby getting humiliated in front of the whole town .

Oh , I think I saw my stem so yeah , in case it wasn't clear , he loses .

He doesn't win .

This girl named Bobo wins .

The winner is Bobo with three points .

She won every single event she deserved to win .

And spook Lee didn't finish any of the events .

He didn't even let alone play .

He didn't finish any of them .

The race .

He didn't finish because he doesn't know how to walk bowling .

He couldn't even make it to the p the other one .

He just flew into the sky .

He had no chance .

So the competition is over and for a second , I was like , wait , is this , how the movie's gonna end ?

Is it just gonna end with Bobo winning ?

And Spooky is still like the town idiot .

The Gourds even break out into this happy song and start singing and everyone's celebrating .

Let's get this party started .

Hit it girls .

But it's not the end because just then a huge ass storm comes out of nowhere .

Mhm It's this giant thunderstorm .

It starts raining .

Wind starts blowing .

Basically , it blows all of the pumpkins into a wheelbarrow and then pushes the wheelbarrow towards the edge of a cliff and a flaming branch falls off of a tree and pins the scarecrow down to the ground .

He's about to burst into flames .

It gets so intense , so fast .

Just moments ago , they were all doing the Transylvania twist and now they're gonna fucking die .

But guess who is not in any danger ?

That's right .

Spook .

Spook realized sitting there it's fine to be round while the weather is fair .

But there are times it's better to be a , the scene is actually like scary and worrisome .

Everyone is screaming for their lives like they're worried they're about to die .

It's pretty heavy for a children's movie .

They're screaming shit like we're gonna die , you're gonna die .

But spooky being the square little beast , he is , manages to climb up the water tower and block some of the water so that it flows over him and onto the scarecrow and put out the fire .

I'm not sure why the rain didn't do that .

It's raining pretty hard .

And then he saves the pumpkins .

He blocks the wheelbarrow from going over the edge of the cliff .

They all get off the wheelbarrow and they love him now .

Hello ?

Hi , everybody .

You saved our live spook .

Uh , so that's pretty much the ending .

Very interesting ending .

I'm still trying to figure out what the moral of the story is .

It's like if you're not normal , if you have some weird difference about you , people aren't gonna respect you .

People are gonna think you're weird .

You're gonna lose at everything and , and pretty much everyone's gonna hate you unless you save everyone's life .

People will only respect you if you save them from certain death and they feel eternally indebted to you .

That's the only way anyone will ever like you .

If you're even the slightest bit different , then they all do the Transylvania twist again .

Then at the very end of the movie that night , the farmer comes out of his house , the farmer who owns the whole farm , the only human we see for the whole movie be a square pumpkin and he sees the square pumpkin and he's like , wow , this is beautiful .

Look at this amazing square pumpkin and he brings the square pumpkin , he puts it on his porch and then we cut to like a little bit later and he's glowing .

So I can only assume that the farmer , like , put a candle inside of spooky .

I don't want to look too much into it or think about how he did that , but I'm pretty sure that he put a candle in that pumpkin and all the pumpkins look at him and they're like , wow , he's not so bad after all .

And that's the end of the movie .

So my , my big question is , did they just expect us to not realize that this is a blatant knockoff of Rudolph , the red nosed Reindeer .

But instead of reindeer , it's pumpkins and instead of having a red nose that's being square , the title of the movie even follows the same formula .

It's like name the weird trait species creature , whatever guys .

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Well , thank you guys for watching this video .

I hope you enjoyed it .

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So if you want to check those out , get that , I just released a song and music video for Spooky hoe , stream it on Spotify or itunes or wherever you listen to music .

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I'll see you guys next time with a really interesting video where I discover my parents' portal to the ghost world and venture inside but accidentally become half ghost .

Bye like that .

All these other spooky dudes can't get October 30 .

Yeah .

Yeah .